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Tales From the Night

Writer's picture: Justin Scoggins, Th.D.Justin Scoggins, Th.D.

Being a parent has changed a lot of things in mine and my wife’s life. Being a parent has taught us a lot about ourselves. Most of this learning has been hard. We found out how selfish we were. We discovered that putting our wants and needs on the back burner is way easier said than done. But we have also been taught a lot about grace, mercy, forgiveness, and genuine unconditional love from three little kids that we get the honor to call ours.

 

         The past few nights have been rough. From babies waking up to having to put our eldest son’s cat down… it’s been one of those times where you just wait for the dust to settle so you can gather yourselves and move forward. While I know in the scheme of things, these issues are meaningless… when they are a part of your everyday and small piece of this existence, they wear you down. Mentally and physically. Still, I have a hard time even seeming to complain about my life with all that is going on in the world… all the strife, suffering, and death makes these issues amount to nothing. These things, however, are very real for us and for a lot of other people.

 

         Two nights ago, our daughter woke up around 2:30 AM. Screaming. She has a set of lungs on her, let me tell you. I was on the couch because I had a sinus infection and snore so loud that my wife wants to elbow drop me and do other Kungfu type moves while I sleep. We both wake up and do the drill. Get the baby, calm her down, get some Motrin (she’s teething) and then my wife takes her to rock her in my great grandmothers old wooden rocking chair.

 

         What happens next is a memory that I will cherish for the rest of my life. I hear my little girl babbling in her sweet voice, fully content to be held and rocked by her mother. Then I hear my wife singing her some songs. It was this beautiful little moment of peace and beauty in the middle of parental exhaustion. We’ve had many nights like this. Each child has their time of needing one of us in the middle of the night.

        

         We are their safety. When things go wrong and it’s dark in the house, Holly and I become the peace and comfort that they need. The funny thing is, when this happens, all our annoyances and frustrations seem to dissipate with relative ease. We step into nurture mode and the only concern that we have is the well-being and peace of the children that are in our care. For example: every night, without fail, I must lay with our middle child. Now, he’s wild. 100 mph all the time. But when we lay down for “night-night” and say our prayers, he always grabs my face and says, “I love you daddy.” Let me tell you, it doesn’t matter the day I’ve had or how crazy they’ve been, this moment is THE moment. This is his posture and heart towards me all the time, even when he is in his wild moments.

 

         Our oldest wants to be near us when he’s had a rough day. His emotional intelligence hasn’t caught up with his IQ. He has a hard time processing change and dealing with things that aren’t perfect. We’ve learned to help him breath and to talk. Gather his feelings and communicate as best he can. However, we have learned that he just wants to be near one of us. His feet touching us, laying on us, or snuggled on shoulders. During the night, if something goes wrong (bad dream, restlessness, whatever) he consciously seeks me out. The same when he’s sick. There is this need on his part to be nearby.

 

         All of these scenarios got me mulling over the verse of scripture in Matthew 18. It goes:

 

“At that time the disciples came to Jesus and said, “Who then is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” 2 And He called a child to Himself and set him among them, 3 and said, “Truly I say to you, unless you change and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 So whoever will humble himself like this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 And whoever receives one such child in My name, receives Me; 6 but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it is better for him that a heavy millstone be hung around his neck, and that he be drowned in the depths of the sea.”

 

This often gets interpreted or spoken about as “childlike faith” which is something that Jesus never mentions. He says: “Unless you become like children”. Children who seek their peace and comfort in times of stress. Children who rely on the ones who are their constant source of protection and safety. We are told to become children, and hope and trust in the face of whatever life throws at us whenever life throws it at us. It is the present experience of seeking the peace and safety now.

 

All the kingdom imagery and terminology in the Gospels is not about “leaving earth and going to heaven when we die” but about “heaven coming down to earth while we live.” Seeing the kingdom of heaven is not about life after death, but about living and experiencing God’s life in this life here and now. This is what Jesus has in mind when He teaches about becoming like a little child. Experiencing the life of God in this life requires humility like a little child. But how?

 

In thinking about my Tales from the Night: becoming like a little child means that we maintain the wonderful and beautiful characteristics and qualities of children that life in this sinful world tends to beat out of us as we get older.

 

Things that are: tenderness of conscience, openness about emotions and feelings, creativity, imagination, wonder and awe, joy, eternal hope, playfulness and humor, trust, easy forgiveness, undying love, boundless exuberance, energy, always thinking the best about life and other people, and being willing to learn and grow. Wonderful things that allow the magic of life to be experienced and enjoyed in fullness.

 

These are the sort of qualities that tend to define children, but which get stripped out of people as they encounter the sin and brokenness of this world. This is what, as parents, we try to nurture and ensure that our children experience and recognize as truth and reality despite what the world would have them to believe. We are tasked with being their protection and safety in the night…and the darkness that creeps in as we get older. The darkness that steals the grandeur and majesty of life. To be like children is to revolt against this dying of light. But as we turn into adults, we lose our childlikeness. We get bored with flowers, bugs, and sunsets. We lose delight in talking with others about absolutely nothing. We become scarred and scornful. As adults, we hold grudges, hold fears, and prefer to be angry. We refuse to forgive and remember wrongdoings as justification for our actions. We lose hope because our hopes have been crushed and destroyed so many times. We do things because of routine and have trouble imagining anything different.

 

But children do not behave in any of these ways. What’s even more interesting is that Jesus didn’t either. One of the things that attracted people to Jesus is that He was “childlike.” Does this mean He lacked in any area? Far from it. Jesus was “childlike” because He was full of the wonder of life, the hope for humanity, and the beauty of creation. Jesus lived in awe of life, awe of God, and awe of humanity. And this awe was contagious. People who saw how Jesus lived began to see how life should be lived. Jesus revealed how God intended life to be lived. In other words, those who begin to live life like Jesus are those who begin to see heaven come down to earth. In the darkness of night, children seek out the ones that supply them with that heavenly peace. They show us how to extend grace, mercy, forgiveness, and unconditionally love…much like Jesus did.

 

They begin to see the rule and reign of God unfold in their own life with all its beauty, majesty, glory, and creativity. This is what Jesus Himself lived, and this is what Jesus invited others to live also. He taught that if you want to experience God’s life in this life (the kingdom of heaven), then you need to become like a little child once again. Jesus ran to the comfort of his Father when He needed to find peace, just like our children do to us. In the middle of the darkness, he had hope, because in His childlikeness, he ran to the one that was the source of His stability.

 

To become childlike is to trust and have fun. Laugh. Play. Imagine. Sing. Dance. Hope. Dream. Forgive. Create. Trust. Live life to the full. Be excited. Be adventuresome. Be tender of heart. And most of all, love. When you live this way, you will become like a little child, and will see the kingdom of heaven rise again our lives. And just a little bit of advice, pay attention to the tales of the night if you’re a parent, you might just see the childlikeness that is a window into the kingdom of Jesus. It’s quite beautiful. And maybe remember to be a kid, or at least spend time with them. They can teach you a lot about the heart of God.

 



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Getaway Gee
Getaway Gee
Jan 11, 2024

I keep thinking about these pictures - of Holly singing over the littlest and your oldest always reaching out, anchoring himself in physical connection. It's such a beautiful picture/reminder of the Father and Mother heart of God who rejoices over us with singing and is always waiting to gather us to Himself. Thank you for the reminder to return to that childlike state of not only reliance but unquestioning trust and security that every we time we reach out He will be there, every time we scream in the darkness He is present to comfort and soothe. Thanks so much for sharing this blog.

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Artwork credit: The Last Supper, Sadao Watanabe ,1977

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